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Lamtarra…

This is located in Akihabara, it’s on the main drag, so you can’t miss it, it’s caddy-corner to the Club Sega.  This ended up being one of those oft referred to stories I tell about how Japan is REALLY weird sometimes.

So, at street level, Lamtarra looks like a shop that sells video games and “race queen” videos, really fluffy stuff, all cheesecake photos and nothing really odd.

I walked in first back in 2005 and jumped on the elevator.  Most of the other stores I’d been into up until that point had these same elevators, taking me up several floors to descend and find different kinds of merchandise.

Well, Lamtarra is PORN for floors 2-6.  And they’re not shy about this either.  I walked out onto the 6th floor to find a photography studio.  Photographer was on break smoking a cigarette.  This floor has since closed in 2011, but the freaky-ness doesn’t even begin until floor 5 anyway.

Basically take the worst fears of what you would ever think “there’s a PORN for that?”, and that’s on floor 5.  Nothing by what we, as Americans, would consider illegal, ie no kids, no snuff, but pretty much whatever else you can think of… EWWWWWW.  They sell it.

Floor 4 was a more ratcheted down floor, only selling BDSM and European stuff (all censored), floor 3 selling American stuff, and floor 2 selling JAV videos.  

I’m not exactly prude by any means, but there’s stuff in this store that would make me blush.  

The wife and I definitely had some “WOW.” moments in this store.  I recommend it if you’ve got a strong stomach. 

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I’m posting this because I promised more “PG-13” ish content, but this blog isn’t intended to be a NSFW blog.

Go google what a Tenga Egg is.  I’ll wait.  

Done?

Good.  Why would you get one of these?  I dunno, broken hands?  Arm falls off but… heck, I don’t know.  

This was in Nakano Broadway, and for 500¥, it was a bargain.  I guess.  If you’re into that sorta thing.  The pattern on the egg is what the inside texture of it is supposed to be.  That’s all I’m sayin’.  <_<;

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I’m going to let this one explain itself in 3 parts.

Reading from the sign (we didn’t go inside… we’re good, thanks…)

4-5th floors were theaters.  60 minutes for basically $12.

3rd floor was selling videos on DVD and VHS.  American and European (likely censored).

2nd floor was selling “merchandise” what kind exactly, should be plainly visible to anyone who can read.  The title says “Adult Goods” in katakana.

What amazed me is that there is an extremely brisk trade of these stores in Osaka’s Den Den Town that appear to be almost entirely trading in VHS tapes.  Have these guys never heard of the internet?  haha.